Love makes you do some crazy things

"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me," Luke 9:23.

As I am settling into life back here in Northern Ireland, I have heard different reactions.  But one that struck me hard was that some had feared that I wouldn't return because well-intentioned people were advising me to think seriously about taking the job offers I had been given while home in the States.  Anyone who knows me and the types of jobs that were offered know that they are right up my alley and careers I would truly enjoy having.  However, I knew in my heart that if I did not return to Northern Ireland for the next three years, I would be giving into my fleshly desires to be comfortable, self-reliant, and selfish.

These are not words to describe a Christ follower.  These are words that describe a worldly person.  I don't want to be defined in those ways.  I don't want to be comfortable, yet empty.  I don't want to be self-reliant and, therefore, stressed.  I don't want to be selfish and apathetic.  I want to be uncomfortable so I continually look to God for guidance.  I want to rely on God, knowing that He can do more through me than I could ever do on my own accord.  I want to be selfless, for "what is [my] life? For [I am] a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes," but God is eternal (James 4:14).

Some may hear of my denying those jobs and declare it crazy.  But I know I would live my entire life looking back in wonder, regret, and disappointed in myself for not following Jesus' call on my life.  The truth is, one of those jobs is still open to me, no matter when I return.  It's not to say that made leaving easier, but it more felt like Jesus reminding me that no matter where I go, no matter what I do, He is with me, He is providing for me, and He will honor me, His beloved, because I choose to follow Him, my beloved.

Love makes you do some crazy things...I'm ready to ride this wave of crazy Love for a God who loves me like crazy.